Poetry by Jeff Green

2945–Chatocracy.html

Chatocracy

by cricketjeff on October 4, 2010.  © Jeff Green, All rights reserved

I’ve hatched a plan that simply can’t go wrong,
So brilliant I’m sure I’ll get a gong,
We should have done things this way all along,
We’ll let the TV pundits run the show!

Prime ministers (and real men with blood)
May worry that a notion is a dud,
But “TV man” gets rightness in a flood —
They never have to think, they ALWAYS know.

These demigods and celebrants who sneer,
Find opaque arguments completely clear,
We mortal clods having nothing left to fear,
When has-beens, hacks and hoots get into flow.

You know these fools, you’ve heard them on the News.
They’re there each day to share their weighty views,
Or crush some hard-pressed sap beneath their shoes,
The dogs with whom the ten men went to mow.

They concentrate a soundbite at a time,
And know a changing mind’s a proof of crime,
The ultimate depositors of slime:-
We ought to bomb the greenhouse where they grow

Portillo, Paxman, Toynbee and the rest,
Must be this ancient nation’s shining best,
And that’s another rant got off my chest,
I finished so it’s time for you to go!

Goodnight All

Author notes

I may have mildly exploded at the television watching Newsnight tonight, hearing Paxman yet again completely fail to listen to the people he was interviewing, Polly Toynbee spouting utter bilge and Michael Portillo’s name had the right meter …

I am sure all you non-Brits have your own range of grossly overpaid total non-entities to tell you haw the world should be run, if not, I volunteer for the job!