Poetry by Jeff Green


On the Art of Writing Limericks (Cleanish version)

by cricketjeff on October 8, 2010.  © Jeff Green, All rights reserved

Three amphibrachs sound quite exquisite,
As soon as a second three visit.
If two more then follow,
The sound won’t be hollow
And you won’t be asking “what is it?”

It’s not like the fourteen line sonnet,
Few poets will ponder upon it,
But if you need laughter,
Or something still dafter,
Then no other verse has outshone it.

“Di-DUM-di” repeats are the basis;
They rigidly maintain the stasis,
But rhyme is the reason
This verse form’s in season,
The figs of this formal oasis.

Though limerick writers keep slaving,
Their content, is often past saving,
It’s jokes about willies,
Or tits, bums and jillies,
And squadrons of nuns misbehaving.

So now that the Lim’rick is mastered,
You should take a shot at the b*st*rd,
I feel quite excited
As soon as I’ve writed;
In fact I run off and get plastered!