On the Art of Writing Limericks

On the Art of Writing Limericks
by cricketjeff on September 21, 2010.  © Jeff Green, All rights reserved
Three amphibrachs sound quite exquisite,
As soon as a second three visit.
If two more then follow,
The sound won’t be hollow
And you won’t be asking “what is it?”

It’s not like the fourteen line sonnet,
Fewer poets will ponder upon it,
But if you need laughter,
Or something still dafter,
Then no other verse has outshone it.

“Di DUM di” repeats are the basis;
They rigidly maintain the stasis,
But rhyme is the reason
This verse form’s in season,
The figs of this formal oasis.

It’s rarely worth over inflating
The content, it’s most often mating,
Or jokes about willies,
Or tits bums and jillies,
And squadrons of nuns masturbating.

So now that the Limerick is mastered,
You should take a shot at the bastard,
I feel quite excited
As soon as I’ve writed
In fact I run off and get plastered!