Three twenty-first century piggies

Three twenty-first century piggies
by cricketjeff on September 18, 2007.  © Jeff Green, All rights reserved
Three little piggies are off on their own
Just got some cash and a mobile phone
None of the pigs knows what to do
But TV shows gave them a clue

First little pig doesn’t want to wait
An instant house would be just great
Get it built in quite a whirl
So there’s more time to find a girl!

On the web he finds a site
Promises a new house overnight
Pays by card and quick as a flash
A flat packed home for not much cash!

He fits slot A into cross member B
Puts screw C into screw hole D
All the way from A to Z
He did just what the paper said

In three short hours his house is there
Down the pub with time to spare
When he comes home, a wolf is waiting
It’s little pig’s house he’s contemplating!

He knocks at the door to talk of “god”
Piggy spots there’s something odd
It’s something of a golden rule
Jehovah’s Witnesses seldom drool!

Though he slams the flat-packed door
Of being safe he isn’t sure
He’s gonna need his money back
Just two puffs and “House flat-pack”!

Piggy two says “I’m no fool”
Buys a house from a friend from school
The cost is low, he’s saving loads
Wants a car to “rip up roads”

The house needs fixing in and out
The walls aren’t really all that stout
He thinks it will suit him for a time
The mortgage he got was called “sub-prime”

Brand new car is parked outside
Took a sow out for a ride
Home for coffee, not too late
Another wolf is there in wait!

Piggies in and front door slammed
But sad to say the windows jammed
When the wolf whips up a blow
Something major’s got to go!

First two piggies running fast
See their brother’s home at last
Doesn’t seem to be that rough
Could be that the future’s tough

But this third piggy has a happy grin
Welcomes both his brothers in
If there’s a wolf he knows what to do
The Cafe next door sells “Korean Dog Stew!!!”