The Reason for the Difference!
by cricketjeff on January 15, 2015. © Jeff Green, All rights reserved
In England we use esses where Americans use zeds
And how we say the final letter drives them off their heads.
Far worse than that, they’re short of ues and cannot use diphthongs
But please don’t be too hard on them or point out all their wrongs.
It’s not their fault they can’t do right, they simply can’t make tea
A life without ambrosia would be the death of me!
In England we play football with a ball and use our feet
The fit between the name and game is really rather neat.
Americans play soccer, that’s a term our toffs employed
To tell apart the World’s prime sport from others they enjoyed
But if they had a decent drink I know they’d soon agree
To use the proper names for games, then settle down for tea.
In England we use knife and fork, and use them as a pair,
Americans use only one, when they attack their fare
They eat their veg and then their meat, the two don’t share a plate
But over here we mix things up, the combination’s great.
If they could learn to drink the drink that sets the spirit free
They’d surely conquer decent meals, then sip a bit more tea.
In England we adopt most things Americans will change;
Most people can’t say schedule now, a fact that I find strange.
We dote on non-celebrities, some shops sell chips as fries,
Call Father Christmas Santa and wear Halloween disguise.
But there is one changed custom that will never ever be
The best of English boys and girls know what they need is TEA!!!!
Author notes
English