{"id":3947,"date":"2023-11-26T20:27:08","date_gmt":"2023-11-26T20:27:08","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/?page_id=3947"},"modified":"2023-11-28T23:04:45","modified_gmt":"2023-11-28T23:04:45","slug":"the-crime-of-the-century","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/the-poems\/the-crime-of-the-century\/","title":{"rendered":"The Crime of the Century"},"content":{"rendered":"<p> The Crime of the Century<br \/>\nby cricketjeff on June 23, 2009.\u00a0 \u00a9 Jeff Green, All rights reserved<br \/>\nAround the world when Christmas morning calls<br \/>\nBefore the dawn a mournful wail erupts.<br \/>\nIf pretty parcels opened by the smalls<br \/>\nContain a fault that certainly disrupts.<\/p>\n<p>No dreadful noise when trigger grip is squeezed,<br \/>\nNo halting flight that ends on sister&#8217;s bed<br \/>\nBut disappointed faces of the teased,<br \/>\nAnd parents who&#8217;ll soon wish that they were dead.<\/p>\n<p>Humanity requires that all obey<br \/>\nA simple rule that everybody knows.<br \/>\nOffending givers must be made to pay<br \/>\nFor dishing out this worst of Yuletide woes.<\/p>\n<p>No readers of my verse would be so rotten<br \/>\nTo give a toy with &#8220;batteries forgotten&#8221;!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The Crime of the Century by cricketjeff on June 23, 2009.\u00a0 \u00a9 Jeff Green, All rights reserved Around the world when Christmas morning calls Before the dawn a mournful wail erupts. If pretty parcels opened by the smalls Contain a fault that certainly disrupts. No dreadful noise when trigger grip is squeezed, No halting flight [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":9742,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-3947","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/3947","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3947"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/3947\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7560,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/3947\/revisions\/7560"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/9742"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3947"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}