The Darker Side of Sue
\nby cricketjeff on March 18, 2010.\u00a0 \u00a9 Jeff Green, All rights reserved
\nWhen Sue was first arrested it was quite a minor charge,
\n\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Well minor by the standards she has set,
\nAnd when you read the details it’s a wonder she’s at large,
\n\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 An oversight so many now regret.
\nIt isn’t that she’s evil, just obeys some different laws
\nAnd nothing can defeat her when it’s in between those jaws.<\/p>\n
He really was quite foolish to suggest it impolite
\n\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 To push into the queue to buy a stamp.
\nShe found him in an alley and she set the record right;
\n\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 His headless body hanging from a lamp.
\nIt isn’t that she’s angry, just she’s not as calm as some
\nAnd there’s nothing in the rumours that she learned to cook with Mum …<\/p>\n
Her next “official portrait” was when some-one disappeared,
\n\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 She’d been the last to see him it was said;
\nThey never found the body and her lawyer got her cleared
\n\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 And in reward he didn’t end up dead.
\nIt isn’t that she’s touchy, just her fuse can be quite short
\nAnd thinks decapitation should be counted as a sport.<\/p>\n
She doesn’t speak to “exes”, since her exes cannot speak,
\n\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 She finds that rule avoids unpleasant scenes.
\nA man who called her “sexy” found a pick-axe through his cheek
\n\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 And parts of him were served with chips and beans.
\nIt isn’t that she’s hasty, all her killings have a cause;
\nConventions from Geneva have her banned from fights and wars!<\/p>\n
The last time that they caught her, twenty children killed by fire,
\n\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 The magistrate said things would have to change,
\nThe words were hardly spoken when his fate was in the mire,
\n\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 The fool had said these words when well in range.
\nIt isn’t that she’s nasty, she’s a really loyal friend
\nBut turn your back a moment and you’ll find you’re at the end!<\/p>\n
Author notes
\nNot many people know about Sue_Cardwell’s hobbies …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
The Darker Side of Sue by cricketjeff on March 18, 2010.\u00a0 \u00a9 Jeff Green, All rights reserved When Sue was first arrested it was quite a minor charge, \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Well minor by the standards she has set, And when you read the details it’s a wonder she’s at large, \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 An […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":9742,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-4493","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/4493","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4493"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/4493\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7015,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/4493\/revisions\/7015"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/9742"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4493"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}