The Daily Papers
\nby cricketjeff on May 18, 2017.\u00a0 \u00a9 Jeff Green, All rights reserved
\nWhile visiting the smallest room one thing is on your mind,
\nAnd there’s a crumb of comfort that you really hope to find.
\nSliced bread they say defines our age the best thing that we’ve done
\nBut there’s another modern boon that I would say’s THE one.
\nInventors toiled for ever to produce our modern World
\nBut progress really started when this product was unfurled!
\nIf you’ve been busy sitting and you find there’s nothing there
\nBefore you sing this silly song I’m sure you’ll have a swear!<\/p>\n
“For therapeutic papers I would sell my kids and wife
\nFor therapeutic papers I would face the direst strife
\nFor therapeutic papers I would give you all I own
\nBut I’m stuck in this tiny room alone”<\/p>\n
We used to use a catalogue and read before each use
\n(But Rabelais’s Gargantua preferred a living goose)
\nAnd then some clever fellow thought of paper on a roll,
\nWith perforations making sheets he hung it by the bowl
\nOur daily chores were eased at once and life was filled with joy
\nTechnology provided bliss all people can employ
\nUntil the day you settled down to ease internal woes
\nAnd found there’s nothing there to wipe your arse or blow your nose!<\/p>\n
“For therapeutic papers I would sell my kids and wife
\nFor therapeutic papers I would face the direst strife
\nFor therapeutic papers I would give you all I own
\nBut I’m stuck in this tiny room alone”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
The Daily Papers by cricketjeff on May 18, 2017.\u00a0 \u00a9 Jeff Green, All rights reserved While visiting the smallest room one thing is on your mind, And there’s a crumb of comfort that you really hope to find. Sliced bread they say defines our age the best thing that we’ve done But there’s another modern […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":9742,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-5600","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/5600","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5600"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/5600\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5908,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/5600\/revisions\/5908"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/9742"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/nicewaistcoat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5600"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}